We’ve all been out to eat and had an awkward moment when the bill arrived. Some in the group may insist on paying the whole bill, while others want to split it evenly. So what’s fair or proper bill etiquette when you’re out to eat? It’s never fair when you’re stuck splitting the bill when you ordered a salad and everyone else had multiple drinks and filet mignon. But, you don’t want to be ‘that person’ who makes a fuss. Here are some etiquette tips to help you navigate splitting the bill.
1. If You’re Grabbing Dinner with Friends
If you’re having a casual meal with friends, traditional etiquette rules may be a little more blurred. It’s okay to talk about how you’ll split the check before the bill arrives. Some friends are okay with splitting the bill evenly, but everyone has a different budget. Try to be flexible and respectful before making assumptions.
2. Ask The Server to Split The Check at The Beginning of The Meal
If you plan on splitting the check, ask your server at the beginning of the meal. Some restaurants don’t allow for split bills because it takes up too much time. Especially if you want to split it more than 4 ways. If your server knows that the bills will be separate, it can save a lot of headaches.
3. Settle Up Later
It may be easier to use one person’s card and then settle up later. It’s a lot easier to use Venmo or PayPal to pay the person who covered the bill than to ask for separate checks. Make sure that everyone knows what they owe so you don’t have awkward situations after. You don’t want to have to remind friends to pay you.
4. Don’t Take Advantage of Those Willing to Pay More
Before ordering food for the table, make sure you ask everyone else. Assuming that the people you are dining with are willing to split the cost of something is not a good idea. If something truly is for the table, the cost is usually split evenly by everyone. Take a hint from the rest of the table, if everyone is ordering less expensive meals, don’t be the one to run up the bill.
5. Deal with The Drinkers
The hardest part of splitting the bill is accounting for those who are drinking. For those that don’t drink, they are usually saddled with a higher bill every single time. Especially if you plan on having several expensive cocktails, you may want to get your own check or pay more of the bill. You don’t want to be known as the person who doesn’t pay their fair share.
6. The Host Typically Pays
If you explicitly invite someone out to dinner, the host traditionally pays. Say for example your meeting your son or daughter’s partner for the first time. If you invite them to dinner, it may be expected that you pick up the tab. The same goes for business dinners, if you invite someone out, dinner’s on you.
7. If It’s Someone’s Birthday
Typically if it’s a birthday celebration, everyone should pay for the birthday person’s meal. It seems like this etiquette has been thrown to the wayside. Even if the person of honor invites you to the celebration, you should offer to pay for their meal. Think of it as a birthday present.
8. If It’s a Date
Tradition gender norms say that the woman doesn’t pay. This notion has shifted in recent years. Everyone has a different preference when it comes to the bill on a first date. A good general rule of thumb is that whoever extends the invitation pays the bill. If the other person insists on splitting the bill, don’t make them feel uncomfortable. If you go on more dates, it’s okay to talk about how the bill will be paid. Most couples split the bill as the relationship progresses.
Don’t Make a Scene at The Restaurant
It’s always better to not make the situation awkward at the restaurant. If you plan on paying for the bill, you can hand your server your credit card on the way to the restroom. It’s a great way to covertly pick up the tab and avoid any awkward conversations. Otherwise, it’s best to have honest conversations about how the bill will be paid. This will help avoid awkward situations or resentment later. How do you handle splitting the bill when out to eat?