Finally, accepting that a relationship is causing more harm than good is a hard first step. Many of us choose to ignore the signs of toxic relationships, especially with family, because of the pressure to stay. This is especially common for long-term relationships because we feel we have invested too much time and effort just to walk away. The truth is, if you are reading this, you may have already seen toxic relationship signs. If this is true and you want to leave unhealthy relationships and get yourself back. These are the clear toxic relationship signs to speed up your wakeup call:
1. The Relationship Feels Bad All the Time
All relationships have their ups and downs. Narcissistic relationships have a way of making you feel bad all the time. From the moment you wake up to the sleepless nights, there is always a sense of dread and doom. This is one of the clear signs of a toxic relationship. This feeling doesn’t just apply to a partner making you feel bad. It also extends to other family members and toxic friends. The moment it feels like you need to disappear and escape to feel better, it is a sign that you should walk away.
2. You No Longer Express Your Needs Because it is Pointless
Is it a constant battle and struggle to feel like you are being heard? Has it come to a point where your needs are being ignored, and you no longer talk about them? If this is true then it is time to consider leaving a toxic relationship. In any relationship, whether it is with a partner, other family members, or friends, your needs should be taken into account. If the people around you continually dismiss or belittle your needs, these are signs of a toxic relationship you cannot ignore. The longer you put your needs behind, the more you will lose yourself.
3. The Relationship is One-Sided
Learning how to identify a toxic relationship also means looking at your own actions. If you are someone who exerts 110% of your effort to keep a relationship alive, there might be some underlying issues. It takes two to keep a healthy relationship going. When all the effort is one-sided, this can be a sign of narcissistic relationships. A narcissist will feel entitled to your love and devotion but will not do the same for you. If you are bending over backward for the relationship to work but the other party is not, this is your sign to leave.
4. You Keep a Scorecard, and You’re Losing
Keeping track of someone’s mistakes and doing the same to you is a red flag of unhealthy relationships. This is behavior not limited to just your partner. Toxic family members and even toxic friends will also bring up your past mistakes over and over again but will never consider theirs. When your relationship has reached the part where you are always wrong, and the other party is not, it may be time to consider walking away.
5. You Can’t Say “No”
One of the most apparent signs of toxic relationships is the lack of boundaries. Toxic partners, friends, and family members feel entitled to your “yes” whenever they want something from you. They will make you feel bad and guilty for setting boundaries and saying no. The constant emotional abuse will take its toll if you don’t take a step back and think of yourself and your boundaries. Sometimes, selflessness isn’t a good deed. It’s just a response to abuse in unhealthy relationships. Remember, saying “No” if needed is good for a relationship.
6. Passive-Aggressiveness
All healthy relationships are based on good communication. When someone continues to act passive-aggressively towards you every time you make a decision they don’t agree with. They are showing signs of a toxic relationship. People will use passive-aggressive actions as a manipulation tactic to make you feel bad. It is a form of secondary gaslighting that will make you question your decisions. When their attitude makes you constantly doubt yourself, you are in a bad relationship.
7. Problems are Never Resolved
Are you always talking and arguing about the same problems, and nothing has been resolved? These are toxic relationship signs you should not ignore. Arguing about the same issues without finding a solution can wear you down. In some cases, toxic people will do this to get their way slowly. Don’t give them the chance to manipulate you this way. It is time to start setting boundaries and learning to walk away when it becomes unhealthy.
8. Their Problems are Always Bigger than Yours
Sharing your problems with loved ones is a good way to vent and connect. However, when you are in a narcissistic relationship, the other party will find a way to make your issues about themselves. Instead of finding comfort, you always end up having to comfort them. This is a form of emotional abuse that will affect your mental health negatively.
9. No Privacy
A nosy parent who checks your phone or reads your journal, a partner who needs all your passwords, or a friend who asks private and invasive questions. These are all signs of toxic relationships because they invade your privacy. When someone does not respect your boundaries and insists on being invasive, leaving a toxic relationship could be your solution. It will be challenging, but you deserve to feel comfortable with the people around you.
10. Physical or Verbal Abuse
While one of the most apparent signs of toxic relationships, most of us find it hard to admit if we were physically or verbally abused, or in many cases both. When the abuse has reached a point where you are physically and verbally assaulted, you should find help ASAP. You are placed in a highly volatile situation, and it is best to leave. Never put yourself in danger because you feel a sense of loyalty towards the abuser.
Never Ignore the Signs of Toxic Relationships
Learning how to identify a toxic relationship is just the first step towards healing. Your mental health journey is not linear, and there will be bumps and struggles along the way. It is essential to seek help and find a safe support system that will prevent you from going back to unhealthy relationships.